The Floridiot Files

BOLO: Overweight Ninja ATM Thief

According to the AP, via the Sun Sentinel, the Palm Beach Sheriff’s Office is looking for an heavyset, potbellied man who twice tried (and failed) to steal automated teller machines while dressed as a Ninja.

Breast Pump Bandits caught

Police have now caught the two men who stole $15,000 worth of breast pumps to sell on eBay.

The original theft was reported in First Coast News:

PORT ST. LUCIE, FL -- Port St. Lucie, Florida police are looking for two Coral Springs men who they suspect stole more than four dozen breast pumps from a local Babies "R" Us store.